Interview with Daniel Graves (Aesthetic Perfection)

“I’M RACING AGAINST TIME”

Over the past twenty-six years, Aesthetic Perfection has evolved from a side musical experiment into Daniel Graves’s primary creative project. Today, the artist talks not only about music, visual aesthetics, and his upcoming album, but also about the fear of not having enough time to create everything he envisions, perfectionism, inner darkness, and the price one sometimes has to pay for a career. In this conversation, we discuss why creativity has become the best form of therapy for him, why an independent artist needs to learn to leverage connections, and why even a hatred of the stage can turn into a personal challenge.

What does Aesthetic Perfection mean to you today, compared to what it meant 15–20 years ago?

Despite all the changes across the years, the one thing that has remained constant is my dedication to the mission of expressing raw human emotion. I always envisioned this project as a way to communicate all the different facets of the human experience. Anger, joy, happiness, sadness, love, heartbreak, everything… I never wanted to limit myself to one sound or one “vibe”.

I see you're also planning several shows this fall. Can we expect any surprises for the audience?

With the momentum we’ve gained from the Lindemann tours we feel like we are in a great position to update the production values a bit. So while I won’t give out any spoilers, I can promise you we have a fun show in store for you.

Do you feel like you're no longer catching up with your past self, but competing with your future self?

These days I feel as if I’m racing against time. I may only be 43, but I’m acutely aware of the fact that my time is running out. When you’re 25, mortality doesn’t seem real, when you’re in your 40’s and your body begins giving out on you in ways it never did before, you see things much differently. I would say that I’m not so much in competition with my future self as I am in competition with time itself. There’s so much left that I want to create, I fear I won’t get to it all.

At what point did you realize the project was no longer an experiment but a lifelong passion?

I started Aesthetic Perfection as a side project to my “serious” band. The problem was, with my serious band, I overthought every detail and never managed to finish or release anything. At the time, Aesthetic Perfection was an outlet for me to create quickly without judgement. Of course, once it became more successful than my main project the same problems emerged and I’ve been fighting the overthinking ever since. However, music has always been my passion, so there was never any question that music would be the path I would pursue in life. Aesthetic Perfection was just the form my passion took.

If you were starting Aesthetic Perfection from scratch today, what would you do differently?

That’s a difficult question to answer, because there are so many potential variations of it. Do you mean what would I do differently if I could start again at 17 in the year 2000? Well, I would certainly learn how to sing and scream before releasing multiple albums. I would learn everything I could about the business to avoid all the pitfalls I stumbled into along the way. If you’re asking what I would do right now, at 43 in 2026, when starting a new musical endeavor, it would certainly be to maximize all my leverage before releasing a single song. Call in every favor anyone owes me to make sure my work gets as much of a headstart as possible.

I still love how you find simple yet creative visual solutions for your music and literally create videos and photos in your own home. Would you like to be a director or creative director for another band?

I know this will sound a bit harsh, but I don’t care about anyone else’s art. At least not enough to sacrifice my time, energy and ideas in service of their artistic endeavors. As I said before, I don’t feel like I have enough time to execute my own ideas, let alone enough time to work on a project that isn’t mine.

Which composition was the most difficult for you emotionally?

I don’t know how it is for other artists, but for me there is zero emotional difficulty in the creative process. Quite the opposite, really, it’s the most freeing and enjoyable experience in the world (even when the subject matter is tough). I imagine myself somewhat of an explorer, I play with ideas until one resonates with me. Most of the time I don’t even know why something clicks, but once it does, I simply follow that idea to its conclusion. What that means is, I almost feel as if I’m excavating an idea as I create it. I don’t know what it will be, I just know it has to come out. Only once the entire song is done can I take a step back and realize what it is (and maybe have an idea of what it means). Sometimes I don’t know the meaning of a song until years later.

What inspires you most outside of music today?

Magic, parlor tricks, books, museums, a good meal, a long bike ride, a hot shower, a cold swim, my cat, my wife, stinky cheese, a fancy bottle of wine and the smell of rain.

What have you learned about yourself through music?

Everything I know about myself I have learned through music. This journey has been the best therapist a fucked up kid like me could have ever hoped for.

What quality has helped you most in your career, and what personal trait has sometimes held you back?

I still struggle with perfectionism. Sometimes I have trouble letting go of a song or an album or an idea. But that’s just ego, and I’m doing everything in my power to overcome my ego and just let things be what they will be; for better or worse.

Is there a fear you still haven't overcome?

Heights.

What criticism has been the most helpful for you?

I don’t know if this came in the form of a single piece of criticism, but in the past I was so driven, so focused on my work, that nothing else mattered. Anything that happened in my personal life took a backseat to my career. I missed birthdays and anniversaries and weddings and vacations all in service of my goals which was deeply unhealthy. These days I really do my best to find time for a private life.

What do you feel five seconds before you go on stage?

I hate performing live. Every moment onstage is fucking torture. So the first five seconds before I go out there, all I can do is fantasize about running away and never coming back.

Was there a concert after which you realized, "That was the best night of your life"?

I know that I am the minority here, but I do not like live music. I don’t like attending concerts as a patron, nor do I like performing live. So, for me, the best night of my life had absolutely NOTHING to do with a concert.

What has become easier today, and what is much more difficult for an independent artist?

I think I’ve made my peace with a lot of the aspects of this job that I didn’t like before. As I said, I don’t like playing live, and I used to struggle with it a lot. I would have nightmares about big shows, sometimes months in advance. I would lay awake at night nearly having a panic attack at the thought of stepping out on stage. These days, I accept that performing live will always be a part of this, and to take that challenge head on. It’s almost like a competition with myself. “Let’s see how good I can be at something that I hate so much!”

You're quite active on social media. You often comment on other people's posts and share your own thoughts. Which platform do you enjoy the most, and how many hours a day do you think you spend online?

My screen time is embarrassing. I need to find a way to be more present in the real world and disconnect from the internet. But I do genuinely enjoy connecting and conversing with people online, I just need to manage some level of equilibrium. Instagram and Facebook are my biggest platforms, but I’m back on TikTok again because it’s good for discovery. To be honest, though, I don’t have a favorite. I just go where the people are, the platform is irrelevant to me.

Are you planning on releasing a new full-length album next year, or are you still more focused on releasing singles?

The new album is nearly complete and will be released next year. I know it’s been a long wait, but this one is… brutal.

What should remain after Aesthetic Perfection?

Men like me all seek immortality. Our insecurities and fear of death drive us to create something that will outlive us. Growing up, I always felt like I had no right to exist. So I’ve spent my entire life trying to prove to the world that I deserve to be here. I know now that was a fool’s errand. I will never be immortal or good enough for the world. All I really need to be is good enough for myself and the people I love. When I’m gone, that will be the only thing that matters.

What part of your personality do you hide even from those closest to you?

I would say, at my very core, that I am a deeply sad, angry and insecure man. I make no secret of this, though. The people who know me, those closest to me, know very well what lies at the core of my being. However, I also know that I am not defined by that. Ask yourself, are we the thoughts that reside in our heads or are we the actions we take in the world? Does it matter that my heart is full of hate if I move through the world with love? I choose not to give into the darkness and to live with as much joy and positivity as possible.

If you were allowed to ask yourself only one question in thirty years, what would it be?

Was it all worth it? Did I do my best? Did I win my fight against the darkness?

How has your understanding of love, friendship, and trust changed after so many years in the music industry?

There are no friends in the music industry. In fact, the truth of the industry is best summed up by a fake quote by Hunter S. Thompson (which he never actually said):

"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."

There are no friends here. There is no loyalty. No love, just lies.

If you had to choose only three Aesthetic Perfection songs to describe yourself as a person, which ones would they be and why?

Dead Zone - Because I’m still certain that one day I will die by my own hand

The Ones - Because I still have those nightmares about losing my teeth

Love Like Lies - Because, deep down, I’m still a selfish, horrible human being

Jenet Bonishi